White Death Returns
February 9, 2010
Over the weekend, 14 inches of snow blanketed my life.
It was all good, I had been to both the liquor store, and the grocery, and it was a weekend. Throw in the Super Bowl, and it was the perfect recipe for R&R.
other than the snow shoveling, it really wasn’t a huge deal.
Today however, it was a little different. By the time I was up and getting ready, another inch had already landed, and it was going to keep up for several hours. This sucked.
Schools were closing, businesses were letting out early, even the D-man’s daycare was shutting down early. Everyone but me.
I had a meeting I had to go to, and also had to drive on some very questionable roads. I made it there and back safe, and no major harm was done. The big problem, was going to be shoveling this batch of snow.
The sheer volume of snow over the weekend, coupled with the fact that it hasn’t been warm enough to melt since, means that the spots where I toss the shoveled snow, is really piling up. I always “think about” tossing it so far into my yard, just in case it snows more, but usually just end up getting it out of the way as fast as possible.
This was a bit of a problem tonight. The piles next to my driveway are already chest high, meaning I either need to invest in a snow blower, Jedi mind trick my wife into doing it, or heave shovels full of snow over the pile and out of the way, thus risking finishing off what remains of my rotator cuff, or having a heart attack.
More snow is on the way. Another 2-4 over night they say, which is fine with me.
I’ve learned that the best approach is to do it in shifts, every 4 inches or so, and drink heavily while doing it. I live on a good drink/shoveling street. I’ve drank and shoveled with 5 different neighbors, some of which trade their snow-blower for cold beer from time to time. I have learned, that unless you have an insane amount of snow, or don’t feel like drinking, shoveling is the way to go. It’s decent excercise, and mush safer to operate a shovel after 6 beers, than it is to operate a snow-blower. Plus, learning to run a snow blower on the fly, in a really heavy snow, can be a bitch.
So despite the fact that I no longer have anywhere to put the snow, and I only have enough beer/scotch for a couple more days unless I get reinforcements, I’m rather enjoying all this. We had, what I like to call, a breakthrough moment.
Today, my son and I, finally played in the snow. We’ve been out in it before, but this was the first real deal snow adventure for us. The D-man, is extremely picky about his footwear. He pretty much throws a huge fit if we put his snow boots on him. He acts like they weigh 100 pounds, and walks like a Nazi in them. It’s funny to watch, but only for a moment, and then he gets really pissed. In fact, he hates it when we try to make him wear anything other than white Nike shoes. This is going to make College Basketball Scholarships, and future shoe deals interesting for him, but I digress.
Today, we finally got the boots on him, as well as his mittens, coat, and hat, before he could get them all stripped off. I whisked him into the backyard, as he was bawling his eyes out, and we started playing in the snow.
It was awesome.
As soon as he was in the knee-deep snow, he forgot about his boots, and started loving it. We threw snowballs at my shithead dog, which he thought was the funniest thing in the world. He even fell over from laughing so hard, and we got it all on film. We learned about not eating yellow snow, and other important life lessons. We tried to build a snowman, but my shithead dog ate it, so we threw more snowballs at him. It went on, and on, and we both loved every minute. He didn’t want to go back inside, and I think he actually likes his boots now. By the way, he can walk normally in snow while wearing the boots, but on a normal surface, he goes back to the Nazi goose-step.
So now, I’m not worried about the too big to shovel over pile of snow next to my driveway. It’ll make a bad-assed fort tomorrow, and now, I don’t have to worry about what anyone thinks. Instead of being the weird drunk 30 year old guy building a snow fort by himself, I’m being a loving father.
Life is good my friends.
You can’t teach your son to make a snow angel when it’s 60 degrees outside, or throw snow balls at a shithead dog for that matter.
Life is good. Let it snow.
Who Cares
February 8, 2010
Last evening, I had to hear about how “this is the worst halftime show ever” about 90 times. Yes, the Who did suck, but lets be realistic here.
Don’t all live performances pretty much suck anyway?
I mean, unless you’re there to see someone dancing,(12 year olds, and serial masturbator’s) and don’t mind listening to their voice either be horribly in need of a studios touching up, or enjoy lip-syncing, it was a less than stellar show.
I’ve been to a lot of concerts in my day, and can honestly say the only show I’ve seen where the performer didn’t make me want to rob the ticket counter in a vain attempt to get my money back, was Norah Jones. Even she wasn’t nearly as good as her recorded album was, and that was Norah Jones.
The point is, live performances suck in general. Sure, there is an energy from the crowd, and some people are good showmen, but the overall quality of the music, doesn’t even deserve the word quality.
It’s even worse, if you judge by halftime shows. Super bowl halftime shows are to entertainment, what McDonalds pies are to deserts. Yes, the basic ingredients are there, but afterwards you want to throw up.
At no time, was there ever a good Super bowl halftime show. From last years shameful display of Bruce Springsteen flopping around out of breathe trying to finish an 8 minute set, to a montage featuring Britney Spears and Kid Rock. Nothing says good music like those two.
So I say, lets not fault the Super Bowl halftime show for being what it is, lets just call a spade a spade.
There is no ideal halftime performer. Not The Who, Not Beyonce, or Taylor Swift. No matter how popular, or how relevent thy are, they are going to suck really bad.
Lets just do away with it all together.
It’s the last real football for months. We can do analysis, highlights, montages, even an awards celebration.
Whatever, it’ll be better than shitty versions of once great music.
If nothing else, lets just do strippers one time, an one time only. Figuring the fallout that followed the Janet Jackson boob thing, actual strippers will not only be fun to watch, but may finally rid us of this horrible tradition.
Flawless/Rigged
February 7, 2010
I’m torn at the moment.
Torn, because the team I was rooting for (once Cincy, and Arizona went down) actually won. Sure, in years past, the team I rooted for actually won the Super Bowl, but that team usually became my team on the thursday before the game. This time, my Saints won. They are the NFC version of the Bengals, so now I can actually hope, which will surely be my demise. However, I am torn.
I feel that CBS purposely shot down most of my predictions.
Archie Manning, went missing. Kim Kardashian, must have been off making another sex tape. Every time Pete Townsend was getting ready to windmill, they panned off onto one of the other geriatric Englishman who make up ‘the Who’. The Gatorade, that I’m sure was really purple, was digitally altered to look burnt orange on television. I almost forgot about hurricane Katrina.
All of my prop bets, went to hell.
I did say it would be a blowout, but that was because I stayed home hoping for a great game. usually whenever I change my plans in anticipation of something, the opposite happens. On that, I was waaay off.
All that being said, I’m glad the Saints won.
My son picked a blue horseshoe over a poorly drawn Flo’ de Le, so I too went with the colts. As soon as he went to bed, the tide turned. Literally the next play, Pierre Thomas scored the go ahead TD, and I was a saints fan. After all, how often do you get to see your cousin score a touchdown in the Super Bowl? Not just him, but I also noticed 2 other Thomas’ getting real playing time for the Saints. It’s hard to keep track of all my cousins, with the economy and all.
So yes, I can honestly say, my team (sort of) won. The team with the most Buckeyes, with all the Thomas’, and literally the NFC version of my Bengals won the Super Bowl. I actually feel like, at some point in my life, I may see the Bengals win a Super Bowl. I’m not gonna bet money on it, but the Saints give me reason to hope.
I know Tracy Porter actually scored a TD, but did anyone else pay attention to the job Malcom Jenkins did? He should be defensive MVP.
On another note, I’ve always made fun of the female sideline reporters, but I gotta say, neither Soloman Wilcotts (Go Bengals), and Steve Tasker, are no Erin Andrews, nor are they Charissa Thompson, and really if you think about it, after we’ve all been drinking, they aren’t even Suzie Kolber.
On one more note. Thank God Dick Lebeau made it into the Hall of Fame. It was a long time coming, and rather embarrassing that he wasn’t in already. one of the greatest DB’s of all time, racking up a ton of int’s in an era when nobody passed (still 8th all time) not to mention the single greatest defensive coordinator of all time. He invented the zone blitz, and made the 3-4 defense what it is. The pride of London Ohio, is finally heading to the hall. Outside of that, why the hell is Chris Carter still not in?
It was a slap in the face, that Michael Irvin got in over him last year. Seriously, Michael Irvin, or Chris Carter. Imagine Carters stats if he was the #1 receiver on those Cowboys teams. Irvin was not even close to being the best receiver on his own college team, and benefitted from his surroundings in Dallas, and still didn’t have the career Carter did. Now John Randle is in over CC? Jerry Rice, is the greatest receiver of all time. However, look who was tossing it to him, and lining up at running back his entire career. Then compare the running backs, and QB’s who played with Chris Carter. A broke down, over the hill Warren Moon was the best he had. Remember that?
Chris Carter, is at worst, the second greatest receiver of all time. If he would have had guys like Joe Montana, and Steve Young throwing him the ball, and the likes of Bill Walsh (the greatest offensive mind of all time) calling the plays, Jerry Rice would be an after thought.
Chris Carter deserves better.
So here you go ‘Nawlins. Live it up.
The real reason I wanted to see you win, is because I am counting on you guys flat-out exploding. I can only imagine what’s gonna happen in your city.
A few years back, Ohio State almost los to Ohio University. I almost wanted to see OU beat OSU, just to see Athens Ohio become a smoldering crater filled with empty kegs, and frat queers. Now, you could trump all that.
Don’t let me down.
Back in action
February 7, 2010
No thanks to Time Warner, the internet has magically returned.
It’s a great day!
I was mere moments from joining a convoy of dust-bowlers in search of internet out in Californy. Just in time for the Super Bowl, it has returned.
Oh the web sites I’ll go to now.
But first, lets get my picks out of the way now.
I’m not sure how this is going to play out, since some things will cancel eachother out. For instance, I think this is going to be a great game, so i’m staying home, and watching the game in peace. If I go to a big Super Bowl party, the game itself will be great, and I will only be able to pay partial attention to it, since I am at a party, and other people are there, most of which don’t care about the game. If I stay home, the game will be a blowout.
However, anytime I go on record and say something, the opposite happens. So anything could happen, but I’m bracing for a blowout.
This morning, during coloring time, I drew a Saints logo, and a Colts logo. I let Dylan pick which one he liked best, and he repeatedly pointed to the horseshoe, so since he’s going with the Colts, as will I. I can’t betray my son, plus the week before the Bengals playoff game, his favorite color was green. he clearly knows what he’s talking about, as this week it’s blue. Colts win big is how we’re leaning.
As for the Prop bets, I can hardly wait.
I think Pete Townsend is going to go crazy on the windmill’s, now that people are betting money on it. I invision a triple windmill, thus putting him over the top on the televised guitar windmill’s. i’m taking the over.
First touchdown, gotta go Dallas Clark.
Over under for total points? Over.
Color of Gatorade bein dumped on the winning coach? Stay away from this one. One of the best kept locker room secrets, is that they mix several flavors to star players liking. It’s rarely one color, or even one flavor. That being said, I’m going purple. Peyton Manning likes the Orange gatorade, and if you mix it with anything, you’re surely gonna get purple.
What color blouse will Kim Kardashian wear? Odds are it’s black. She’s too curvy to risk light colors, or any striped shirts, but look out for gold on this one.
Total mentions of Huricane katrina? I’m saying minimum 12. Take the over.
Number of times they show archie manning? Way over on this one too. Gotta figure a blowout either way will lead to about 5 shots of Archie as the clock runs out, not to mention start of the game, and after big plays. He’ll beat the spread on this one by 6.
Well that’s all I feel like putting my money on. The only exception could be the most penalties, and on that I have to go Nawlins. It just fits their style, and their gameplan.
Enjoy the game every one, and remember. Any money lost from taking my own advice, is your own damn fault.
Still Here
February 5, 2010
Not to worry everyone.
I am still here.
It appears that Time Warner is once again trying to silence me. Perhaps it’s because I called them worthless, money hoarding bastards, or that I said they suck. It could also be simply because they have the most unreliable service of any cable provider in the nation. It’s got to be tough, having to offer continuous flow of internet, through an attached cable line.
Either way, I have been without any of the internets, for over 3 days now.
No service at home, nor any I can pick up in range on wireless, and I have been working outside the office all week, meaning, I’m screwed.
Somewhere out there, there’s a webmaster of a bunch of porn sites who is worried sick about me. If you read this trannysurprise.com guy, I’m okay, and god willing, I’ll see you soon.
So sometime in the next week to 3 years, I will have internet service again.
I’ve got a lot to say….
The Jackets fired the best coach they can ever expect to have. Urban Meyer began his leave of absence (on the same day Tiger Woods left sex-rehab…Hmmm). Our fearless President, through no acts of hs own doing, “fixed” our economy (great news for all of you without jobs, I bet it was all those highways we re-paved that did it)
I paid out the ass in Taxes this year. That part is my fault, and my wife’s too I guess. We were so busy trying to work hard to save our jobs, and provide for our family, and save up to build our dream home, that we accidently made too much money, and now get to give even more money to our fearless leaders in Washington, who can continue to be worthless bastards. Maybe next year I can go on unemployment.
Hopefully, God, and Time Warner willing, I can get into all this in more detail in the near future. Otherwise, log onto google earth, and check out satellite footage of the snow blogs I’ve been writing in the snow in my backyard.
We Shall Have Them All!
February 3, 2010
Ah Ha Ha!
Like A diabolical genius, the Reds seem to be collecting shitty middle infielders. like Hitler collected tanks in the mid-thirties.
So what, if our best player is Brandon Phillips, who happens to be a middle-infielder. We can always use more right? What if he goes crazy like Joey Votto?
You can never have enough middle infielders with a career batting average in the mid .200’s. At least that’s what I always say.
If not them, then the least you can do is trade for white middle infielders who hit less than.200 for the cubs last year, right?
Won’t that make us good?
When I first saw the Reds had landed the Cuban defector, the left handed pitcher who can chuck 100 mph fastballs, I went nuts.
I started puffy-painting 2010 World series champion t-shirts, and calling Yankee fans to trash talk.
Then it hit me.
It wasn’t that we outbid the big-boys, or performed a scouting coupe, it was just that this dude wasn’t really that good.
Remember the year the Pistons won the title, and had like the 3rd over-all pick from a trade. You had Lebron, D-Wade, and mello, and they drafted that Russian/Polok dude nobody knew about?
He now pitches for the Reds.
In 6 years, he’ll be a small forward in the the Latvian basketball league.
He was our big-offseason move.
Now, we our chasing him down, with the likes of Aaron Miles, and Orlando Cabrerra.
Yum.
I smell the playoffs…
So what if both of these guys at best are decent players? Who cares that neither can provide the batting average, or the power numbers this line-up needs to be a factor?
We signed somebody. That counts for something right?
The only problem is, I’ve seen this before. Like, for instance, the last 20 years?
Instead of counting on Alex Gonzalez having one of the best gloves at short-stop, and no bat to back it up with, we , a lesser glove, with a slighty shittier bat.
Yeah!
On the bright side, Willy Taveras is gone. on the dark side, so is Adam Rozales.
Sure, Rosales wasn’t that good, but he was at least a fan favorite.
If your baseball team sucks, fans can relate to the white guy who spent 9 years in the minors, and hustled all the time, whilst batting .240
When a Latin dude, who makes 8 times what Rozalez made hits .240, and doesn’t run out infield flies, it’s bad news in Cincy.
Look at Ryan Freel.
The guy sucked at baseball, but as long as he crashed into a wall of some kind, be it, in straight away center, or on the bridge to Kentucky, the fans loved him.
Oh well.
Who knows?
Maybe this year homer Bailey will be really awesome, and stuff, Micha Owings will be able to pitch, Dusty will know what to do with pitchers, and the whole thing will be awesome.
I’ll still be counting down the days til football season.
Chasing a Dream
February 1, 2010
Do you ever get the feeling your life is running on a different track than what you wanted it to? Ever feel like what you’re doing isn’t what you were put on this earth for? Have you reached a point where you feel like you could be doing more? Has all the problems with your life came to the surface at once, and you don’t know what to do?
Today, all these things happened to me at once, and so did the solution.
I thought my life was great, until I had an epiphany.
Not only was what I’ve been doing for an occupation pointless, mind numbing, and at times degrading, but it also makes me have to deal with a lot of strangers. Strangers who are mostly un-attractive, and mildly retarded.
This I can no longer deal with.
However, it was while I was dealing with this, that I not only recognized my life’s problems, but I also saw the solution.
I had just left this Indian dude’s house (asian type, not cool casino owning type). He had literally kicked me out of his house, which smelled like curry anyway. I was there to asses some problems, that turned out to not have anything to do with my company, or any of it’s affiliates. I may have been less than professional at explaining to him how I was going to do nothing to help him, but that’s because he was hostile to me from the start. All the time he was yelling at me, and I was fighting the urge to punch him in the face, and insult his religion, I had an epiphany (part 1). My job kind of sucks.
I’ve known this for some time, but it pays really well, and since I don’t care what anyone thinks about me, or says to me, I’m one of the few people on this planet who are suited to get paid to do this for a living.
On my way out of there, the epiphany completed itself. I noticed the big sign at the edge of his neighborhood, displaying the neighborhoods title.
The Preserve it said.
That’s when it hit me. Somebody out there, gets paid good money, to give gay names to neighborhoods, and apartment, and condo complexes. I should be that guy.
I’ve always laughed at the retarded names these properties have.
I’ve long since believed that the names were decided by people who read romance novels, and sniff airplane glue, that’s why they all have gaytarded names.
I can fix this.
I can make these names. Instead of gay “dreamy” names, I’ll make them either overly realistic, or just plain badass.
Take this particular neighborhood, The Preserve.
It’s not a preserve by any means. What, did they manage to preserve it from it’s natural state, and turn it into tract housing for middle class americans, and frugal Indian people?
I think, Discount New Albany explains it better.
If you want to attract people with a great name, don’t make up The Preserve (gay) call it Margaritaville.
Which would be cooler to explain when giving directions. “That middle class hood just down the street from chik-fil-A, or Margaritaville? It just welcomes a good time, and a perfect way to keep out the riff-raff. There are no noise complaints in Margaritaville, as we all know.
Look at these names. They all suck.
Drive around some time, and take a look. Everything is named by the lady with 29 cats.
The Preserve, The Links (for anything within 4 miles of a golf course), The sanctuary, The Glenn, The Homestead…etc…etc…
And many, many more.
They go on insisting that this neighborhood/apartment complex is a paradise on earth, or at the least, something close to what it’s name says.
I say, if we call it what it really is, ‘Bunch of White Houses, with Vinyl Siding-ville, or All Those Beige Stucco Houses behind Kroger, or Those apartments by the highway for recent college grads, waiters, and Mexicans, it would make life easier.
Why not give it a name that says what it really is?
That land that Farmer Johnson used to own, before he moved to Florida.
Think how awesome it would be to tell someone that the apartment complex you lived in wasn’t called The Oaks, but instead something awesome like…Ram-Rod. Or maybe, The After Party. Or, The Morning After.
One could go on, and on. The Preserve’s at Tittysburg.
So there it is, my new dream in life, laid out before me, like a road-map.
It’s gonna be a bumpy ride, but I’ll always have my bourbon, and my airplane glue, to get me through it.
What the….
January 28, 2010
This got weird.
The other day, as I was scanning to see if any strange search engine terms lead people here, I came accross one that stood out.
It was…Greg Oden Nude. It was just one hit, so I thought nothing of it. Maybe at one time I thought it would be funny to put those words together just to get people to accidently come here.
It’s fun to do. Say I type the phrase…
Oprah sex change.
If anyone googles that line, this site will pop up.
Like I said, it’s a lot of fun.
now however, it’s getting out of hand.
I got a call from a friend/blogg-reader, who jokingly called me out for ruining Greg Odens life. He was just kidding, but before I got home, the story was all over the place, about Greg Oden having nude pics on the internet.
Imagine my surprise, when I saw this in the blog manager section.
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| yardbarker.com/users/gregoden | 1 |
Now I’m worried. maybe I did accidently out Greg Oden. Did I at some time post pictures of greg Oden nude? I’m pretty sure I’d remember that, but I am a little nervous. The fact that a ton of people are looking for these pics, and the crazy internets are leading them here, may still be funny, but it could also get me in a lot fo trouble.
Is this going to be what finally gets me sued? I hope not.
Does this mean I run a gay porn site now? I really hope not, although I hear there’s crazy money in that field, and in this economy, who could blame me?
So what i want to know is, how the hell is my site popping up when people search for pics of Greg’s “power forward”?
I’m sure it’s a big mistake, but all the same, I am offering a case of delicious Pabst blue Ribbon beer to whomever can solve this mystery.
I’m with Tebow
January 27, 2010
With the exception of Greg Oden’s wang, the “Big” story today, was the news about a commercial set to air during the Super Bowl, starring Tim Tebow.
this of course, has caused an uproar.
Not from fans of one of Tebow’s rivals, but from the retard-o-nation, because Tim had the audacity to take part in a “Pro Life” Commercial. Most of the uproar is over the fact that this is a “Pro Life” commercial, but if it was just any old commercial, and didn’t star Tim Tebow, we would never hear anyone complain.
It’s way more offensive if someone famous takes part in it.
Lets break this down real quick.
First off, I’m with Tebow on this one. Anyone who knows me, knows that I’ve always been a huge Tim Tebow fan. Okay, not so much a huge fan, but I got him on this one.
The commercial in question, tells the tale of an expecting mother, who was having complications with the pregnancy, and was experiencing serious health problems from this. Her Doctor’s advised her to terminate the pregnancy. Because of her faith, this was not an option. In her words “she put it in Gods hands.”
She had the baby, they both survived, and the kid grew up to become Tim Tebow.
That’s pretty much the story in the commercial.
The message is very much “pro life”, but never actually says anything about how a woman should not have a right to make her own choice.
In fact, that’s kind of what Tebow’s mom did, she made a choice.
It’s not about abortion, it’s about life. It’s not as black and white as what the people who are fired up about this would make it out to be. Obviously, the message is no info-mercial for abortion, it’s about life.
Despite what the protestor’s who think this is the worst thing ever say, Pro-life, and Pro-choice can exist together.
Someone can believe in a Woman’s right to choose, and be “Pro-life”.
Just as someone who is Pro-choice, might not necessarily become addicted to having abortions.
If someone wants to have an abortion, that’s their call, but what the message is trying to say is how wonderful life really is.
Think how bad Florida would have sucked these past 3 seasons if Mrs. Tebow did get that abortion. Mark Richt might not be on the verge of getting fired. Phillip Fulmer would still have a job, and urban Meyer would be coaching the Raiders.
It’s a crazy world.
The thing about the Tolerant-Nazi’s who are completely intolerant of anyone who’s thoughts are different than theirs is, they just don’t get it.
How is the world going to end, if a guy of Faith, wants to speak his message for 30 seconds?
Just as the folks who stand outside CBS headquarters, demanding they not air this commercial have a right to their views, Tebow has a right to his as well.
Whether you love him, or hate him, it’s a good story, and just because he tells it, does not mean any women are going to be forced to have babies.
If some poor little kid thinks they are going to see a football game, and gets exposed to this commercial, I doubt they are going to go blow up an abortion clinic.
If they do, go ahead and blame Tebow.
I got your back Tim, even though you suck at throwing footballs.
Arguing With Idiots
January 26, 2010
The selling of the House thing, has taken a dramatic turn for the worse.
We’re still getting a lot of action, which other than the hassle is a good thing, but now I am having to communicate with some of the idiots who may want to buy my house.
Albeit through my realtor, but I still have to talk to strangers.
I have a rule with strangers, that is almost never proven wrong.
Every day, I can meet any number of strangers. Be it 3, 12, or 49, the total amount does not matter. Nor does it matter how many I meet over an extended period of time. What does matter, is how often I meet one that I actually like.
This happens about every 5-7 months. Whether I like it or not.
The economy, the time of year, the amount of strangers I meet, or the setting I meet them in (although the numbers do become skewed in bars) does not matter, it’s about once every 5 months or so that I meet somebody new that I actually like.
Then there is the stats dealing with people I don’t like, but do not wish to harm, which is slightly more frequently that I meet them.
The point is, I am meeting strangers, whom I’m sure I do not like, but I want them to buy my house. So I have to fight the urge to say to them what I really want to say.
It’s like being at work, except it’s during my personal time.
For instance, this one genius, who clearly dreamed of becoming some type of engineer, or maybe an architect. He went through my house this past weekend, and may want to buy it, except for one thing.
He’s quite certain, that I removed a load bearing wall. Never mind the fact that I was certain it wasn’t a load bearing wall, but the laws of physics also declared it to not be a load bearing wall, and my house has yet to collapse in the 3 or so years since I removed it. Not only has it not collapsed, but there are no indications it is about to collapse.
No doors that won’t open/shut, no cracking in the drywall. Nothing.
The wall in question stood under a vaulted ceiling (meaning the load was bared where the joists sit on the exterior walls, and in the middle, or “peak” of the roof line)
Not only this, but when we cut the wall off, it was almost hanging from the ceiling. The base of the wall barely touched the floor.
However, none of this seems to matter to the retard, who may buy my house.
He is certain, it is a load bearing wall, and demands proof that it is not.
He’s asked whether a licensed contractor has done the work, or if I (technically licensed, but doing the work AT MY OWN HOUSE). I responded by saying that I did do it myself, but I had a college professor helping me. (He’s not actually a College professor, but he does work at a College, and knows about all there is to know about remodeling, plus professor sounds better)
Alas, it still may not be good enough.
I may need to have either an engineer, or a “licensed” builder look at the wall that is no more, and certify that it is not load bearing. It sucks because, I will already know this “professional” and need to work around them, and now they will think I am an idiot, all because some douche thinks I tore out a load bearing wall.
I could always pay a stranger to tell me what I already know, but again, I hate strangers, and if I have to pay him, it would be even worse.
Could someone out there, who isn’t a complete retard, please buy my house?
