I have pink eye

Don’t cry for me world, I already have pink eye. So the mystery of what is making me so sick has finally been revealed. Pink Eye. I gotta admit, I was pretty worried it was either swine flu, or super AIDS. Lucky for me it’s neither, just a run of the mill case of pink eye, passed from some kid at my sons daycare, to my son, to me. Hopefully I don’t break the chain, and can pass it on to a whole bunch of people before I get rid of it. So, if I lick your face, it’s in the spirit of giving. I did get a prescription for some eye drops, so that’s pretty sweet. Ah yes Pink eye, the bastard child of all infectious diseases. It’s been lampooned by South Park, and forever linked with Worchestire suace. It’s been wrongly diagnosed by the film ‘Knocked Up’, and now people think it gets passed by farting, or strippers. For those who haven’t had it, it’s pretty awesome. One, or both of your eyes make you look like a pot head, except you also get a little pussy discharge. It feels like something is in your eye, and your throat hurts, and you have a head ache. if you’re super lucky like myself, bright light makes you want to blow your brains out. Hopefully the drops kick in soon, and can get me back to normal.
If nothing else, the mint juleps will set me straight this weekend.