Big Spender’s

So free agent season in the NFL has begun. As usual the Bengals are on the sideline, watching all the other teams address their needs, while they sit back and wait for shitty players to magically get better. This year, it’s gonna happen, I can feel it. Special thanks to commissioner Gooddell, for shooting down thier one attempt at getting a good player. For some reason he seems to take great joy in punishing the bengals. Wether it’s adding extra years to suspensions for D.U.I’s, or voiding trades, he’s doing a great job, keeping the bengals shitty. Mike Brown sucks enough, he doesn’t need any help. Oh well, I’m sure we’ll pick up a great 4th receiver who gets hurt all the time, or maybe a back-up punter, just in case. At least their one scout will bail them out in the draft. What kind of Pro team only has one scout anyway? Oh yeah, the bengals. I’m officially throwing my hat into the ring for the job of volunteer scout. All Mike brown has to do, is pay for my beer, while I watch football. he can send me tapes, I’ll break down all the film, scout whatever players they may want, even write a book report on each team/player. i got a B – on my book report on Lord of the Flies in 9th grade, surely I can come up with some good scoutng reports, that are equally impressive. Although grading people as fat assholes, and pussy farts may not be what they’re looking for, it would be at a bargain price, and would double their current number of scouts. Speaking of the free agent season, good luck to Cleveland fitting under the cap after this season.My wife won a contest at her work, and is expecting to get her prize tomorow. Rumor has it she won a t.v. God willing, i’ll be one step closer to completing my dream of having a t.v. in every room of the house. That would pretty much be the end of the blog, if I get an HD t.v. in the shitter, as I would never leave. Imagine the possibillities, you could watch HD hockey on the Bar t.v. in the basement, watch the reds suck on your way up the steps, watch family guy on HD while you heat up food, pass out while watching shitty cinemax movies in bed, and the next morning while trying to induce vommitting, you could watch sportscenter in HD. This truly is the land of oppurtunities. Chances are the whole “parenting” thing will put a damper on this, but a boy can dream, right?Special thanks to all the meat heads who came in town this weekend for the Arnold Schwarzeneger fitness classic, and the UFC fight. All the money you dropped on Monster energy drinks, protein supplements, and Zubaz pants and tank tops should give our local economy a much needed boost, after the whole 4 foot law for strip clubs went into effect. No it’s not the 4 foot law, that regulates the Donkey show business in tijuana, the strippers have to stay 4 feet away from patrons at all times. Stupid Moral people, ruin everything. It used to be when you would pass a chick and she smelled like FDS you’d think, “Wow, she’s a stripper”. Now if a chick smells like FDS, theres a good chance she’s got a yeast infection. Total bummer.

Posted on Monday, March 3, 2008 at 08:38PM by CTGOBUCKS | 1 Comment